inner pain

Its hard to express that inner pain of me,

Such feelings I just cannot put in words,

But babe, I do know you gave the very most of it,

Forgive me of what I am,

This is somehow just not what I need,

There are times which I loose track of myself,

Any hard words is just not what I meant

Those inner pain of mine, those complicated places I have been,

are all  tearing me apart, 

This is my quiet sorrow

The Habit of Stop Giving Up

"Stop giving up" is a habit. 

It has been never an ordinary line which occasionally appears in any heart-growing films. What you saw from inspiring films like"Cape No.7" or "October Sky" is heart-touching, but will not get you on the road of success in the next moment you walked out of the cinema. In spite of winning the top prize in the lottery, which the possiblity is even lesser than having yourself got struck by lightning, this is not success but "luckiness". 

"Rome does not built in a day"

A survey by 天下 magazine had done interviewing several celerbrities, as to understand their secret behing every successes. The result all lead to one thing- good habits. 

     

 

Experience tells me the importance of avoiding bad thoughts whenever you are in a moment of tiredness. "避免在疲倦的時候產生負面的想法"

Lastly, a quote from Sister Act2 修女也瘋狂2 when the choir of Sistine Chapel felt frustrated after recognizing pre-year's winner had sang the same song whic they prepared.....

"If you wanna be somebody, you better wake up and stay attention"

                                                                                               

Pay Attention and Stop Giving Up!!

 

蜻蜓點水的奇幻旅程

"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button 班傑明的奇幻旅程" 

一個出生就患者奇怪的疾病，外表跟身體像極了六七十歲的老年人，卻隨著年紀的增長，越變越年輕．

看完這部片很難不能讓人聯想到1994年Tom Hanks的"Forrest Gump 阿甘正傳"．

故事的主角同樣在先天條件下都具有異於常人的特徵或疾病，而這些也同樣地帶領著他們面對人生的各種奇蹟．但相較之下，’Benjamin’對於人生的刻劃及體驗我覺得卻沒有’Forrest’來得更深得人心．最大的差異就在於前者在愛情的際遇上比起後者似乎還要來得美滿．而且Benjamin與Daisy彼此的人生與Forrest跟Jenny的也要來得有所展獲．

　我常覺得快樂是需要靠悲傷來襯托彼此才符合人性．儘管Forrest能夠靠著自己與生具來的強壯雙腿加上一點點運氣，讓他順利的從進入明星大學，後來倖免於戰爭中，接著還莫名其妙的打乒乓球進入國家代表隊，後來又幸運的買了艘捕蝦船賺了大錢．在人生的旅程上雖然是越來越平順．但致使至終，臉上從沒表現出一絲絲地喜悅．好吧，能夠重新將丹中尉帶出頹廢的人生的確讓他非常的開心，但別忘了．．．他的那艘捕蝦船叫做Jenny，而且雖然有錢後船是一艘接著一艘的購買，但每當夜深人靜時．．．．．．

．．．'I always thought of Jenny'．

　一句話似乎道出了整部片的精神，

    但我非常合理的懷疑Forrest究竟有沒有為自己宛如奇蹟般的人生經歷感到任何一點成就或僥倖呢? 畢竟他是有智能障礙的，所以才會在人家的雙腿都被炸斷的時候還白目到問人家要不要吃冰淇淋，又或者當著全國觀眾的面前露屁股給總統看．

好了．．似乎離題了．．

有關於Benjamin的這部片呢...的確是稍嫌刻骨銘心．．．

其實這多少也有點要歸咎於台灣的片商，明明人家原名打著是 The Curious "Incidents" of Benjamin Button.....所謂的Incident 就硬是要把他翻成 "旅程"．

問題是整部片當中他不是就在那艘船上嗎？明信片寫了一大堆但電影卻一點也沒演到．．只知道在巴黎跟別人的老婆發生感情．．結果最後還莫名其妙的被提分手．

題外話，那位女士，Tilda Swinton　正是在電影 Constantine 驅魔神探:康斯坦丁　裡演加百列哪為gay gay的天使. 標準的英國貴族高傲的外表，的確挺適合演Elizabeth這個角色．

也許是Brad Pitt給我感覺太沉穩了，不論是過去Ocean三部曲，早期的Meet Joe Black，角色性格都差不多．在Curious這部片裡飾演的是一位從出生就是衰老外表的小孩子，成長過程裡也真的像老頭子一樣整天躺在輪椅中。儘管角色耐人尋味，但故事大部分卻環繞在Ben跟Elizabeth的感情戲中。並未好好把罕見的疾病當作特色，個人覺得這點很可惜。

如果導演能夠多把重點發揮在Ben 離家環遊世界的際遇中，那麼Brad Pit或許t就不會給觀眾那種蜻蜓點水，過水無痕的表面印象吧。

2009.02.09

Its not easy to believe in things that are somehow supernaturual or unexplained. However, incidents have make me to start understand that maybe fate has it own plans. 

I got discharged from the army three months ago and had got a temporary job fortunately back at my old college. To be honest, going back to LHU was the last thought appeared in my mind. I had a plenty of sweet memories during my particpation in student association but not the teachers. I never got deeply involved in the faculty group. My performances in the school made me a good name among the students and teachers, however I was not very passionate about expanding my interpersonal relationships. I worked with many people but most of them turns out to be a nodding acquaintance. Therefore, it would be pretty akward if we bumped into each other in the school. 

But somehow fate has its own games to play....

While I was attending school's anniversary last year, I got to know one of our department's teacher, Julia, who happens to be the cheif of extra curricular activity. Having known my condition, she invited me back to her department to work as an adminitrative assistant and thus then starts with a series of "amusing" coincideneces.

First, I met an old teammate which we used to work with in club activities, which I only realized that he is also one of the cadidates for the same job. Its been such a long time since our last conversation and it certainly was a nice encounter. The second experience  happenss during the school's New Year Banquet I attended just a week ago. The whole feast was being organized very nicely but there was not enough seats in the beginning. Therefore, me and Julia needs to seek around for empty spaces to fill in. And like I mentioned above, I never got into any deep relations with the Department's facultys so it was the biggest embrassing occassion I would try to avoid.

  

however, fate has its own game to play.......

there was empty seats at the DAFL's table.........

Anyway, thats how I fall into this "terrible" coincidence....again.. However, it did took sometime before the ice starts to break. It was when Robert arrives that I gradually began to feel back on the feet. I was surpised that the banquet went quite well later in the whole process. In the end I felt kind of glad for sitting with our teachers.  

evidence has proved that it really can make some changes once you took your step....

 

 

2009.02.06 Relaxation

I enjoy spending my leisure in a quite afternoon,  drawing illurstrations; a cup of hot japanese tea on the table, with Chopin or Yo Yo Ma as the background.  It is during these time of the day I'd feel a sense of relaxation. 

2009.02.05 Re-Thought

Back in college, I always try to avoid circumstances like being alone with the people that are not familir with, or never cut into any conversation between three or more people. I am not really a talkative guy who never lack of interesting topics in his mind.  Frankly, I consider myself as a slow person to get along with. Though such occasions typically puts me and the opponent into an akward atmosphere. 

Of course, I would like to make some changes, as to make myself a better person. But though, this is a society flood with all kinds of people. There should'nt be anybody who is definate to tell you that having a certain character plays the key to success, not your boss nor your parent has the previlage to do that.  

You Change When You Feel Like to Change.